Philosophy News Network: is Philosophy Useless?
Is philosophy useless? Well, it is now on account of the fact that I've solved it.
Bertrand Russell Invents Analytic Philosophy
Continental Philosophers: "replacing words with math symbols doesn't make things clear, replacing words with new words that I just made up makes things clear."
Bertrand Russell has a Near Death Experience
"Also, I've decided to get married again, and this time no divorce!"
Wittgenstein Revises His Thesis
How about this: no one can say anything that isn't grounded in empirical observation, except for Wittgeinstein.
"Derrida is actually quite clear, more clear in some ways than the analytic philosophers."
"But wait, if you order in the next 15 minutes, we'll throw in a Existentialism for free! You'll be in profound, inescapable despair in no time!"
Philosophy News Network: Philosophy Solved
Of course, the entire premise of philosophy being "solved" is ridiculous, since Leibniz already solved it when he wrote the Monadology
Bertrand Russell on the Job Market
Fun fact: the original title of "A History of Western Philosophy" was "A History of Western Philosophy: analytics rule and continentals drool" until the editors made him drop the subtitle.
The Bar Fight
Not shown: Camus triumphantly rebelling against the absurd by picking up a woman at the bar.
Good Cop, Pragmatist About the Nature of Truth Cop
In the end the jury decided that truth was more about a coherence between ideas themselves, and also that Socrates was a dick, so we might as well kill him.
Star Trek: but instead of normal, it's with philosophers
You'd think I would have called it "The Wrath of Kant", but no. I decided to use a way better title instead.
When you think about it, any club can be a fight club with enough spirit.
You thought that last joke wasn't going to be an Office Space sketch? No. BOOM! Radical freedom, it's Seinfeld. And a bit of Dilbert.
Philosophy News Network
That's what people mean when they talk about "experimental philosophy" right?
Until the Pokemon own the gym, they will always be oppressed.
The Philosophy Superbowl
In many ways Wittgenstein is similar to Tom Brady, whose first Superbowl was also based on a mistake: the Tuck Rule. Also, they are both devastatingly handsome.
Dungeons & Dragons & Philosophers II: The Analytic Turn
Russell destroyed most of Frege's items too, when he threw the bag of holding into the portable hole. Frege was pretty cheesed off about it at first, but eventually he admitted it was his fault for not realizing that portable holes weren't quite as secure as he had thought.
Language Games: Philosophers Play Pictionary
Growing up in a wealthy home, Wittgenstein never actually saw a beetle as a child. When he asked his parents and relatives what a beetle looked like, they gave descriptions, but he could tell they didn't know either. As he grew older, he theorized that no one had ever actually seen a beetle. He told all his philosopher friends, who just got really excited and assumed that he was making a profound point regarding the nature of language. He was too embarrassed to correct them and simply pretended like that was what he meant all along. He still isn't sure what a beetle is to this day, or if they even exist at all.
Beetle in a Box
Five naked, blindfolded men get into a hottub. The water represents the totality of facts, what we feel with our hands represents our picture of the world, and our penises...