A philosophy webcomic about the inevitable anguish of living a brief life in an absurd world. Also Jokes

Camus on a Date

Sex Ed classes should really just teach kids that before they have sex they must first justify their existence.

Philosophy in a Free Fall

I always thought the "analytic / continental divide" was poorly named, it's really the nerd/non-nerd divide.

Camus Teaches Elementary Scohol

Camus: "Okay, and that concludes basic arithmetic. "

Camus: "Now we will learn basic philosophy, starting with the most basic question you can ask."
Camus: "Should we all just kill ourselves immediately, or what?"

Camus:  "Can anyone give me ONE good reason why would shouldn't all kill ourselves RIGHT NOW?!"

Student raises their hand.
Camus: "Yes."

Student: "Because God loves us?"

Camus: "Is that some kind of joke or are you really that stupid?"

Camus: "I meant serious answers, like that life is still worth living because you can date a lot of hot babes in your life."
"Yes, life is suffering, but it is still worth living because sometimes you get to make children cry, and that's pretty funny."

Simone Weil vs the Existentialists

Description: Sartre, de Beauvoir and Camus are sitting at a table drinking wine and having dinner, Simone Weil approaches.

de Beauvoir: "Hey Simone Weil, have some wine with us, we have some nice Camembert cheese and duck."
Weil: "Sorry, i can't now, de Beauvoir, i'm off to work at the auto factory."

Camus: "You work at a factory now? I thought you taught philosophy."
PERSON: "yes, Camus, six days a week."
Camus: "But...why?"

Weil: "If we say we believe in the liberating the working class, we must understand on a concrete level how they suffer! Intellectuals cannot pretend to know how to improve their lives without living them ourselves."

Weil: "Also i don't eat fancy cheese, because those suffering from hunger cannot afford such luxuries, so i deny myself them as well."

Weil: "I have to be off, I'm marching for increasing benefits to the unemployed before my shift."

be Beauvoir: "Wow, she really lives by her ideals, doesn't she?"
Camus: "Indeed, she is really the only great spirit of our times."

description: awkward pause.

Sartre: "Super annoying though, right?"
de Beauvoir: "Yes! I'm so glad you said that."
Camus: "Does she have to be ⁠ SO authentic all the time?"

Sartre: "Exactly, we have to be authentic about eating cheese now? Come on. there's a limit."
Camus: "Precisely. More wine?"
Satre: "Please."
Maybe we are authentic in our own way, alright? Maybe it is authentic to sacrifice nothing for your beliefs, okay?

Humean Seduction

Description: David Hume is at a bar with Albert Camus.

Hume: "Step back Camus, let me show you some Humean Seduction."
Camus: "I don't think i need hel-"
Hume: "Just watch and learn, Camus, watch and learn."

Hume: "Hey baby, have i ever told you my theory of how reason is slave to the passions?"
Woman one: "Get lost."

Hume: "Hey baby, have i ever told you my theory of how reason is slave to the passions?"
Woman two: "Fuck off."

Hume: "Hey baby, have i ever told you my theory of how reason is slave to the passions?"
Woman three: "Leave me alone."

Hume: "Hey baby, have i ever told you my theory of how reason is slave to the passions?"
Woman one again: "You already asked me that, and i said get lost!"
Hume: "Oh, shit, sorry."

Camus: "I don't get it, you just approach every woman you see until one of them say yes? This is your big secret?"
Hume: "Of course."

Camus: "But don't you want a real connection with someone?"

Camus: "Don't you want to make a genuine love and passion? To find someone who you can love their heart and all that they are?"

Camus: "And that eventually works?"
Hume: "I mean...it hasn't worked so far, but...one day i'm sure it will!"
Camus: "To find someone who when you are with them it seems absurd to not believe in eternity?"
Camus: "Someone who when you are with them you feel alive and without them you want to die?"

Hume: "Uh...not really, no."
Camus: "Oh."

Camus: "So what do you want, then?"
Hume: "I don't know... a blonde, i guess?"
Camus: "I see."

Hume: "So what line do you use to pick up women?"
Camus: "What? I don't use a line."
Hume: "Then what do you do?"

Camus: "Are you kidding? I'm Camus, the women use lines on me."

One of the women from earlier: "Hey Camus, have I ever told you my theory of how reason is slave to the passions?"

Woman: "No, why don't we go back to your place and you can tell me all about it?"
Camus: "Sounds great!"

Hume, yelling at them as they leave together: "Hey! That's my line!"
"Just because every girl I've ever witnessed in the past has preferred Camus to me, doesn't mean they will in the future!"

We Must Imagine Sisyphus as having Met Camus

Description: Camus is standing in front of the hill as Sisyphus rolls up his boulder.

Camus: "The gods had condemned Sisyphus to ceaselessly rolling a rock to the top of a mountain, whence the stone would fall back of its own weight. They had thought with some reason that there is no more dreadful punishment than futile and hopeless labor."

Camus: "But Sisyphus is the absurd hero. There is no fate that cannot be surmounted by scorn. If his descent is sometimes performed in sorrow, it can also take place in joy, for the struggle itself toward the heights is enough to fill a man's heart."

Camus: "We must imagine Sisyphus happy."

Sisyphus: "Are you being serious right now?"
Camus: "Uh...what?"

Sisyphus: "I'm not happy, you asshole, this is horrible. This is literally the worst."

Camus: "Yes, but you can rebel against your absurd condition an-"
Sisyphus: "Oooooh i can rebel?"

Sisyphus: "If only someone had told me sooner that i could rebel during my endless, pointless torture! Why didn't i think of that?"

Sisyphus: "I'll tell you what, if you think it's so easy to be happy, why don't we switch places? You can push the boulder up the hill forever."
Camus: "Uh...actually i just remembered that i have to be somewhere..."
"The absolute nerve of some people."

Green Eggs and the Absurd


If I'm honest though, the green eggs were still pretty gross.

Punk Rock Philosophy


Exisentialism is the most punk rock philosophy, but Diogenes is the most punk rock philosopher.

Life Decisions


Sartre, what would you do? I would do nothing. Just sit on my ass all day. You don't need to be an immortal God to do nothing, man, Merleau-Ponty does nothing and he is going to die any day.

Philosophers And Physicists



The wisdom nerds got back at them eventually by throwing into the doubt the clear demarcation between science and non-science.

Jenga and the Meaning of Life


As renowned philosopher Al Davis said, the meaning life is to just win, baby.

Good Cop, Existential Despair Cop

Yes, there is ultimately no point in convicting criminals, but a true absurd hero must realize that and lock them all up anyway.

Social Contract Theory: The Game


It turns out that when you agree to play a game with Camus, you implicitly agree to the "Camus Contract". That means Camus is gonna do whatever the fuck he wants.

It's Always Sunny in Paris 2



de Beauvoir: "Wait, weren't we supposed to be defeating the Nazis?" Camus: "Oh yeah, that's right. Oh well, I'm sure it will work itself out."

It's Always Sunny in Paris



Camus: "Wait, so if the meaning of life is arbitrary, maybe it can just be seducing as many girls as possible?" Sartre: "It isn't that arbitrary."

A Day in the Life of Albert Camus

Camus.

Existential Daycare

Of course, it was really a meta commentary on how art can never fully communicate the inward feelings of the artist.

Albert Camus, Existential Agent


"Oh also, I slept with your Mom, but that wasn't really part of it."

Immanuel Kant: the 40 Year Old Virgin



Earlier that night: "Is that really what you are wearing?" "Yes, men love huge feather hats. They find them very attractive." "Alright...whatever, let's just go."

Sexy Vampires and Existential Philosophy



Yeah I mean, life is meaningless and all, but it turns out being a sexy vampire is kind of alright.

Existential Hour


Heidegger used to host the show, but he was fired after some...off color remarks.

Dungeons and Dragons and Philosophers VI: The Angsty Dragon of Angst



It's better to not even begin playing D&D than it is to play as a Bard.

We must imagine Sisyphus as having a hard time readjusting to civilian life


It went out of business pretty quickly, but Sisyphus realized that like 90% of jobs are doing the same thing over and over, so he was fine.

Albert Camus: the Absurd Hero


Is this comic unfair to Camus? Yeah, but that's just part of the absurdity of the world, you know?

Objection!


Although Sartre was obviously in bad faith when he said that Nietzsche has a terrible mustache, because come on.

A very spooky philosophy Halloween


Camus came dressed as himself, because what is really scary is how sexy he is.

Existential Shopping Network


Also, if there are any hot actresses watching, give me a call.

Philosophy Club


When you think about it, any club can be a fight club with enough spirit.

Sartre: A Show About Nothingness


"Albert, this report you turned in. It's crap." "Or maybe it's just so brilliant you just don't understand it." "No, it's definitely crap" "Damn you Simone!"

Philosophy News Network


That's what people mean when they talk about "experimental philosophy" right?

Existential Office



Eventually they figured out that Kafka was actually fired years ago, but due to a glitch in the payroll system he kept getting paid. So they fixed the glitch.

Existential Birthday

Sartre stopped inviting Kierkegaard, because Kierkegaard kept giving him crosses and trying to get him to talk about the stages of despair.

Twelve Angry Philosophers



What? You didn't expect twelve philosophers to agree on something did you?

Candyland and the Nature of the Absurd


Sartre and Camus told everyone that their falling out was over politics, but really it was mostly over Sartre evoking "radical freedom" one too many times at game night

Existential Radio


Camus called back later, putting on a deep voice and bad German accent, pretending to be Heidegger, but Sartre had installed caller ID.

World Cup Philosophy: Germany vs France




For best results, the commentator should be read in the voice of Michael Palin

The Analytics at the Bar


Unfortunately, all the girls left the bar too - scared off by William James
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